I wish I could say I love you
I love you I love you I love you
I love you.
i wish i didn't love you. i wish i could hate you and move on and laugh at how horrible you are for me and how horrible my time was with you.
you drag me around like a toy that needs washing. let me into that clean abyss and rid myself of the dirt you have given me.
let me be clean and soft and ready to receive all your love and soil again.
you said I still could. that you didnt have a problem with my love. but when I bid you farewell the words get stuck in my throat like medicine. I cannot say I love you. instead I wish you some other joy.
stay safe
have fun
be good

but I cannot ask you to carry my love with you. not now.